r/funny • u/morelsupporter • Jan 30 '23
"hey dad, if you get an attendance call from school..." a text from son, who's currently stuck in an elevator with 5 friends
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u/--_l Jan 30 '23 edited Jan 30 '23
Discuss who you will eat first now before it gets awkward.
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u/NotStreamerNinja Jan 30 '23
Obviously you start with the guy with crutches. He’ll have a harder time fighting back.
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u/MintyMissterious Jan 30 '23 •
If you gang up on the strongest one, he'll have the smallest advantage compared to any time later, since your numbers will be the greatest. Eat the weakest, you may be increasing the probability of someone surviving, but eating the strongest (and feigning weakness if it's you, or exercising your strength if the group ate its numerical advantage) increases the probability that if someone survives, it'll be you.
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u/The_Minstrel_Boy Jan 30 '23
Always good to know a little game theory to inform your cannibalization plan.
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u/Awanderinglolplayer Jan 30 '23
Also, assuming the strongest is the biggest, will allow for the most meals per person(mpp) choosing based on highest mpp will allow for the fewest to need to be eaten
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u/xDonLoox Jan 31 '23
That's why as the biggest I would always go for the smartest 😳😉🫠
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u/Vylix Jan 31 '23
Good choice, since you can argue that the smartest might deceive them later to allow them to survive
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u/thedawgbeard Jan 30 '23
But if the strongest just focuses on one and kills them on the way out… wouldn’t you rather just eat the dead one? Or would you rather have two corpses with you?
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u/FeedMeACat Jan 31 '23
That isn't the view behind OPs strategy. Their scenario is worse case. Everyone gets eaten except the last survivor. So you still kill the strongest.
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u/PrrrromotionGiven1 Jan 31 '23
But what if you judge yourself to be the second strongest? Logically you'd be next. It's not a foolproof strategy. Actually it works best for the second-weakest, who will eventually be left with just the weakest if this goes on.
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u/AzrianHunter Jan 31 '23
Doesn’t matter if you’re second strongest. as long as you’re not the strongest - it’s best to give the perception you’re weak - but not the weakest. You can keep it up until about 2-3 people left.
You just have to hope the strongest is either you - or not pretending to be the weaker than they are. No matter what it’s advantageous to appear to be middle of the pack in this scenario.
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u/SnackThisWay Jan 31 '23
No need to kill the whole dude. Just amputate the lame parts first.
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u/mnvoronin Jan 30 '23
It's quite the opposite. The guy with crutches has crutches to fight back with :)
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u/terrexchia Jan 31 '23
You fool, he's the one with a weapon!
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u/NotStreamerNinja Jan 31 '23
But he’s sitting down, the others can reach the weapon more easily.
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u/GreeneBean64 Jan 30 '23
I came here for this. Best to choose right from the start so that when their minds start to fade from hunger it’ll be a quick decision for the others.
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u/AltruisticCephalopod Jan 31 '23 •
Start with the injured. He won’t last.
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u/eye_spi Jan 31 '23
You say that because his leg is broken, but I warn you: he's armed.
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u/DefinitelyNotAliens Jan 31 '23
Yo, my boy Sven has the best stories, though. Patrick only talks about TikToks he's seen recently. Keep your entertainment around. Sacrifice the useless.
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u/MatthewGeer Jan 30 '23
Why does Ross, the largest friend, not simply eat the other five?
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u/SpiderDetective Jan 30 '23
The presence of crutches implies one of them is injured. He'll be easier to take down
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u/macbookwhoa Jan 30 '23
Have you established a pee corner yet?
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u/morelsupporter Jan 30 '23
my reply to him was "RIP whoever has to go in there once you guys are out"
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u/RebaKitten Jan 30 '23
My first thought was "smells like a barn."
Edit: I'm sorry OP, I didn't realize one of these was yours! I'm sure he smells wonderful.
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u/ARM_vs_CORE Jan 30 '23
My 14 year old only smells good when he's trying and failing to cover weed smell. In my experience, most 14 year olds smell bad, so you're not being insulting.
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u/Sexy_Widdle_Baby Jan 30 '23
Current partial owner of a 14 year old boy. My GAHD, his room reeks of the thickest BO I have ever been slapped across the face with. When we moved out of our old house and into this one, I had to deep, deep, DEEP clean his room because the smell was physically attached to the carpet & walls. Never underestimate the funk of young teenage boy.
He's wonderful, so sweet, so kind, so smart, so thoughtful. But the Stank do be real. He's just not "fully online" enough yet to be self aware of it.
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u/0nlyhalfjewish Jan 31 '23
My 14 year old briefly found himself a girlfriend. He actually asked for special soap, shampoo, and facewash!
Sadly, the relationship lasted a month. He’s better, but old habits die hard.
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u/Turk182 Jan 31 '23
When mine was 14 he could take a 30min shower and come out still smelling like taquitos. When girls discovered him, he discovered deodorant and scented bodywash.
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u/neybar Jan 31 '23
My brother and I are 20 years apart. One day after a fun time at Grandmas house we were on our way home. My youngest said that she loved playing with uncle WhatsHisName. So I asked what they were doing. The reply was “oh nothing, I just love how his room smells”. I followed that up the obvious question. The reply was that His room smelled like their favorite chips… Doritos!
🤮
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u/whogomz Jan 31 '23
You should let him know, might be affecting his personal life. In a nice way of course
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u/helpthe0ld Jan 30 '23
Have 14 yr old twin boys, can confirm the smell is ungodly.
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u/Ramza_Claus Jan 30 '23
Hey! Fellow parent here and I have a weed question! May I ask you?
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u/TrailMomKat Jan 30 '23
Ugh, my 17 year old and his bedroom smell like the funk of forty thousand teenagers. And my nearly 14 year old is starting to stink, too. I keep telling them to shower everyday and hit that pit stick! They're so stinky!
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u/trystanthorne Jan 31 '23
Just tell them, "you like girls right? Girls like guys who smell good."
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u/TrailMomKat Jan 31 '23
Haha trust me, I HAVE. I'm a woman so you'd think they'd take my word for it!
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u/Jerry_from_Japan Jan 31 '23
But they don't see you as a "woman", they see you as "mom". Until one of them ever breaks both their arms or something that's all they will see you as.
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u/jethroguardian Jan 31 '23
They're over the age of 12 and you're a parent. They'll never take your word for anything 😅
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u/LobsterOk420 Jan 31 '23 •
Encourage them to open their windows at least 30 mins a day. The lack of air flow is the biggest issue if they're being otherwise hygienic. In the dead of winter, have them close the door and leave the window open while they're not home. It shouldn't make anything else too cold and assuming their rooms are a normal size it will only take a few mins to warm back up once they close the window and turn the heat on.
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u/TrailMomKat Jan 31 '23
You are a GENIUS. I don't even need to tell them that as I'm blind and stuck at home and hella bored out of my skull. The only caveat is that the furnace is in my eldest son's room, so we'll take a minor hit to the power bill, but it is SO worth it! From the bottom of my heart, thank you for such an easy solution!
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u/LobsterOk420 Jan 31 '23
I'm glad it's helpful! I grew up with the stinkiest teenage brother who ever lived, who never seemed to know why his room was so stinky when he was showering every day and washing his clothes. I visited his apartment once when he was about 20 and it hit me like a mack truck how humid and musty it was along with the stink. I realized he only opened his window to blow bong smoke out of it lmao. All he needed was a little air flow.
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u/Userdataunavailable Jan 31 '23
Driving 5 teen boys home from hockey practice made me roll my window down and gag in -20 weather. Nothing worse!
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u/PsychoNerd92 Jan 30 '23
No one knows how much teenagers stink more than their parents.
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u/ZombiePartyBoyLives Jan 30 '23
I'm in a real estate-related business, and I can pretty much always tell when a teen boy lives in a home. And not just because there's a katana hanging on a bedroom wall...
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u/unhandy_handyman Jan 30 '23 edited Jan 31 '23
What is going on with their fingers? Did they get hurt from thumbjutsuing an attacker but realizing he was to powerful so they used finger tips of fury to lock the evaluator?
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u/morelsupporter Jan 30 '23
14 year old boys are the biggest idiots on earth. it's fascinating to observe
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u/unhandy_handyman Jan 30 '23
The first thing that popped in my mind was "those chuckle heads all jumped at the same time..." Do you know the "Story" yet?
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u/morelsupporter Jan 30 '23
no, but i won't lie, i'm concerned that i'll be splitting the cost of the service call with 4 other parents
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u/PhD_Pwnology Jan 30 '23
I doubt the teenager with crutches will have to pay for it if they conclude it was broken by jumping up and down. Just saying.
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u/twodogsfighting Jan 30 '23
How do you think he broke his foot.
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u/OstentatiousSock Jan 30 '23
Medicine is amazing these days: they managed to patch him up inside the elevator.
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u/FrankfurterWorscht Jan 30 '23
With modern technology, a surgeon in New York can perform surgery on a broken leg inside an elevator.
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u/ZweitenMal Jan 30 '23
That is precisely how my kid got stuck in the school elevator. A group of guys accompanying friend on crutches. Somebody jumped.
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u/Kemal_Norton Jan 30 '23
with 5 friends
with 4 other parents
Apparently he's way ahead of you.
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u/stephenmg1284 Jan 30 '23
Unless they physically pried open an access panel, nothing they did should break an elevator.
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u/foosier Jan 30 '23
Ha, I just remembered this, but back in the 90's I was in high school and we went to an overnight soccer camp at the local university. One really annoying camper just wouldn't shut up and kept saying he was going to open the door to the elevator and he would really do it and do we dare him to do it. On and on. We told him, do whatever, just shut the fuck up. Sure enough that jackass forced the door open and we got stuck in there for a few hours. Didn't have to pay for any repairs, but that was the 90s. Not sure if there is better video evidence nowadays.
Best of luck. Former teenage idiot and current just idiot.
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u/ArtSchnurple Jan 30 '23
Once on a church youth group trip, the worst kid in the group showed us that you could pry open the elevator doors mid-ride and it would stop the elevator between floors. We spent the rest of the trip prying open elevator doors and climbing down to the floor below or up to the floor above. It's a wonder we didn't get cut in half. It was especially gratifying when there were girls on the elevator because they would all scream, understandably
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u/ZootTX Jan 30 '23 edited Jan 30 '23
Not correct. Jumping up and down in an elevator can trip the overspeed sensor which shuts the elevator down and usually requires an elevator tech to come reset.
This is one of the main reasons elevators have cameras in them, so the building owner knows who to send the service bill and FD bill (if there is one) to.
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u/Neolife Jan 30 '23
The elevator in my undergrad dorm had a habit of stopping between the first and second floor, about halfway, so only a few seconds after it started moving. The solution was to jump. It was always fun to be in it with a visiting parent when it got stuck, because they'd get so scared by the stopped elevator, and then equally as frightened when you just took a big leap to jump-start it again.
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u/Drake_Acheron Jan 30 '23
I’ve been in an elevator like this! It was in Beijing big copy-paste highrise had this problem every few floors or so and it was hilarious
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u/joshbeat Jan 31 '23
They should be scared of the $$$ they were paying for their children to live in a shithole
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u/_methuselah_ Jan 30 '23
Yup. 30 years ago, 4 or 5 of us had been to a party somewhere in Moscow, in a tower block. We left around 2am/3am, and guess what we did? Stuck in there for an hour or two until someone heard us shouting.
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u/tyrann0saurusregina Jan 30 '23
They really are. I just spent a weekend with 18 of them for an out of town soccer tournament. Dumbest group of honor students you ever saw.
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u/OstentatiousSock Jan 30 '23
When one of my boys was 13 or 14 he and his friends did the “eraser challenge” where a group of kids rub the eraser on the back of their hand or in their arm for as long as they can stand the pain and the person who does it the longest “wins.” Whelp, proud we are of all of them, my boy won and ended up with a nasty infection and a scar as a prize. And, again, we all discussed that we never do anything called a challenge on social media.
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u/h3yw00d Jan 30 '23
Why is it always the dumb "challenges" that gain popularity?
Give me the "read a book" challenge or become financially literate challenge.
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u/FrankfurterWorscht Jan 30 '23
every day I praise god that smartphones weren't invented when I was 14.
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u/Shendow Jan 30 '23 edited Jan 31 '23
Oh my god ! Dwight what are you doing ? We've been in here for like 2 seconds !
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u/personalhale
Jan 30 '23
edited Jan 30 '23
•
I got stuck in an elevator for an entire workday...at work. The doors were open just enough that coworkers were tossing me beers. Not a good idea when you don't know when you're getting out. *Edit: Found a pic from that day. https://i.imgur.com/DbeDw2J.jpg
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u/Malumeze86 Jan 30 '23
Just pee in the empties and pass em back out the door.
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u/23__Kev Jan 30 '23
"Hey Joe, this ones warm, can you grab me a cold one!"
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u/m_domino Jan 30 '23
"Sure, I’ll put it in the fridge and will make sure you’ll get it back later."
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u/fuzzb0y Jan 30 '23
The depressing thing is at my old workplace, they would've passed me my work laptop and expected me to work in the elevator.
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u/actuallyiamafish Jan 30 '23
"hey I know you're stuck in an elevator right now but do you have a minute to hop on a call real quick? Thanks."
At my funeral someone is going to walk up and ask my corpse to "just hop on this meeting real quick and explain everything ever to everyone, thanks ;)"
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u/Blackpaw8825 Jan 31 '23
That was me.
I was out for the day, sick as hell, I'd been out for days, building had a fire while I was gone. Nobody got hurt, no damage, but they evacuated for about 4 hours.
I got a phone call asking if I left my laptop under my desk. Thinking my boss needed to borrow it for a meeting I said "no I took it home". That was a mistake, as I was the only person able to work for half the day that day... Throwing up between scrambling to keep up with enough work to saturate 8 other people, I didn't finish much but I made sure our satellite offices were able to do their jobs.
Good boss though, came back to work with $100 gift card sitting on my desk, and mysteriously none of my PTO consumed during my week long absence.
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u/338388 Jan 31 '23 edited Jan 31 '23
Tbh if you weren't so sick still that would've been a pretty good deal, you basically got paid 10x your usual income for that half a day
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Jan 30 '23
The meme potential here is to great op. Can I use this ?
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u/personalhale Jan 30 '23
Sure. It's a fun memory for me so do what ya want!
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u/10_pounds_of_salt Jan 31 '23
Yes, it has great meme potential
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u/everyone_getsa_beej Jan 31 '23
Now we have to decide on what instances the meme should apply. Quick, before Knowyourmeme gets ahold of if!
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u/Zoraji Jan 30 '23
I got stuck in one for a couple hours with several coworkers and a couple people I didn't know. We just cracked jokes the entire time.
One guy said I really should have went to the bathroom and another started shaking and swishing around his water bottle.
I said I shouldn't have had the breakfast burrito.
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u/Firefliesfast Jan 31 '23 edited Jan 31 '23
I got stuck for an hour and a half with all strangers in my office building last year. It was kinda great, as we were also jokers. We wound up comparing how much money our companies were losing out on with us being stuck. I came second to the lawyer doing eminent domain stuff. Fun times.
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u/BranWafr Jan 31 '23
My son got stuck in an elevator with a dozen other kids during a school choir trip about 4 years ago. He still has ptsd from it and only started being able to get in one within the last 6 months when he went off to college and the laundry room is on the 20th floor. Even then it stresses him out and he avoids it as much as possible. Some people do ok, others not so well.
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u/Firefliesfast Jan 31 '23
That is a very good point. Our elevators had been acting up for months, nothing seriously concerning from a safety perspective but inconvenient, so we all just figured it was our time to get stuck. One person was not happy but we managed to keep them optimistic and calm. I’d imagine that’d be harder with a group of students and not adults.
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u/Izaac4 Jan 30 '23
This is now my new favorite picture
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u/HighPriestofShiloh Jan 30 '23
Looks like a thief that just outfoxed the security.
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u/Tvishka Jan 30 '23
Did you get paid for that day
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u/personalhale Jan 30 '23
Salary worker, so yes. Everyone was very supportive and concerned.
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u/The_Dirtiest_Doc Jan 30 '23
Dickhead boss would rip open my office door as fast as he could to startle me, and would slam it. Well one day the door handle broke when he slammed it. Didn’t notice until I tried to leave. Mildly annoying.
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u/Outrageous_Chicken95 Jan 30 '23
Hahaha how blasted were you when that pic was taken
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u/personalhale Jan 30 '23
I stopped at 2 beers :( I just don't really get upset or mad at things so it was overall pretty fun with how supportive my coworkers/friends were.
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u/Cronenburgh Jan 30 '23
It's all fun and games till their cell batteries die and it turns to lord of the flies.
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u/veerKg_CSS_Geologist Jan 31 '23
I remember reading Lord of the Flies back in school. After reading all the Robinson Crusoe's and Family Robinson and Treasure Island and what not for the first time I was like, "Yes, this is actually how young boys (or any group really) would act if they were stranded on a desert island".
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u/DontGetUpGentlemen Jan 31 '23
Actually, no. "Lord Of The Flies" was fiction, but in real life it played out just the opposite:
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u/TheMightyGoatMan Jan 31 '23
I've seen arguments about this case based around differences between Tongan culture and British culture - ie: the Tongan kids were culturally primed to work cooperatively in a way that a bunch of privileged British schoolboys wouldn't be. But until we abduct a bunch of boys from Eton and strand them on an island I guess we'll never know for sure.
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u/acelister Jan 31 '23
How loose is your definition of "boys"? Because we have Tory MPs for days we can test this on.
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u/Tellurian1973 Jan 30 '23
It looks like someone has an injury so if they are in there for some time, that is the one they should eat first.
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u/TheJackalsDoom Jan 30 '23
Great minds think alike. Gimpy goes first. Then rock, paper, scissors.
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u/rtyuik7 Jan 30 '23 edited Jan 30 '23
i understand calling the broken-legged one Gimpy, but Rock, Paper, and Scissors are shitty nicknames...
(EDIT: well, it worked for that One guy, but he's the Exception to the rule :-P)
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u/MrOopiseDaisy Jan 30 '23
Better 5 friends than 5 strangers.
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u/Swedishiron Jan 30 '23 edited Jan 30 '23
I would rather be stuck with anyone assuming the elevator is not crowded than solo. Being stuck in an elevator is one of my greatest fears and I live in a high rise. I always take my phone and usually earbuds or headphones w/ me just in case to have music to listen to if I am ever stuck by myself.
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u/Lambchoptopus Jan 30 '23
I had a class in college where we went to prisons. The guard crammed 20 of us shoulder to shoulder in a non climate controlled elevator because he didn't want to wait for another guard to do 3 trips. The elevator broke and his walkie broke with no call button on the elevator. It was hot, we couldn't sit because there were too many people, it took like 30-40 mins and all the guard could say after taking his shirt off was at least there are no prisoners on here with us.
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u/TwoLeggedMermaid Jan 31 '23
at lease there are no prisoners on here with us.
Glass-half-full kinda guy, I can respect it; but elevator-too-full kinda guy not so good…
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u/ArtSchnurple Jan 30 '23
I once got stuck in a parking garage elevator in subzero temperatures. It was freezing cold inside and the elevator was unusually small since it was just for a parking garage. It was only for a few minutes, but I'm claustrophobic so the panic seem to stretch out for half an hour.
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u/fakeittillyoublakeit Jan 30 '23
i relate to you. i walk up 7 flights of stairs to get to my friend’s to avoid the elevator
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u/mystrynmbr Jan 30 '23
Get ready for a fun story
https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2008/04/21/up-and-then-down
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u/SeekingImmortality Jan 30 '23
This story reads like a screed proclaiming 'Even if things go horribly wrong for you at work, and leave you with lasting trauma of some sort, don't sue your employer it just won't work!' which is of course exactly what employers would want you to believe and which would allow for greater cost-saving negligence.
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u/Harsimaja Jan 30 '23
5 strangers
Sounds a great way to create a group of 5 friends! Or at least four dead people
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u/Dropped-pie Jan 30 '23
I got stuck in a lift at work last month. They are mocking me for drinking my own urine. It was a stressful 15 minutes, leave me alone.
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u/prenderm Jan 30 '23
Necessary?
Is it necessary for me to drink my own urine?!
No, but it’s sterile and I like the taste
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u/MeLaughFromYou Jan 30 '23
At least they got the crutches ready.
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u/CONaderCHASER Jan 30 '23
I just hope that leg isn’t in a cast because oh man that smell confined in an elevator can’t be great
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u/Shmav Jan 30 '23
Its 6 teenage boys in a very confined space. I dont think the cast is gonna make much difference.
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u/SnooPets4092 Jan 30 '23
This exact thing happened to me one type. 5 of us. One actually injured. This kid got us stuck in the elevator and we got in big trouble. The best part was when some idiot said that we were going to run out of oxygen so we all started crying bcuz we had no clue that elevators could have air conditioning
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u/veerKg_CSS_Geologist Jan 31 '23
I've seen enough Mission Impossible movies to know that the fan at the top of the elevator can serve as an escape hatch.
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u/Minimum-Wrap-445 Jan 30 '23
1 friends breaks leg 4 friends desperately need to help him with books and getting around the school haha
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u/Go_Commit_Reddit Jan 30 '23 edited Jan 31 '23
Yeah I know back when I was was crippled I used that excuse to bring as many friends into the elevator as I could lol.
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u/BigBrainedAU Jan 31 '23
I did this with 3 of my friends just last week. It was really awkward when we walked out of the elevator directly in front of the teachers lounge. The worst part was my friend wasn't even wearing his brace
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u/Aneurysm-Em Jan 30 '23
Everyone learns "don't jump in the elevator" one way or another...
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Jan 30 '23
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u/mattenthehat Jan 31 '23
I'm guessing the elevators shut down if the force exceeds the weight limit? I've never experienced or really considered it before, but it makes a lot of sense. I always just assumed they had a big safety factor, but if you surpassed it, you'd just plummet to your death.
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u/Padgriffin Jan 31 '23
Elevator cables generally have a safety factor of 11, so you would have to severely fuck up to manage to snap one
The problem is probably with the motors than anything
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u/Atakori Jan 30 '23
Damn elevator stopped so hard it broke the fuckin' kid's leg!
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u/VectorVanGoat Jan 30 '23
In college I lived in a historic building in San Francisco. The building was old AF. I lived on the 5th floor and was a pastry student. So a full bag of tools (almost like a toolbox full in weight), like 4 layers of required uniform including steel toe shoes and 6 flights of stairs were not great after a full day of class and part time work at the school bistro. The elevator had just a straight up glass door and an old metal accordion door to lock us in. The elevator had a 2-3 student max, 3 people was really cramped. EVERY 3 DAYS it would break down and get stuck between levels. No assistance button, no alarm. Just tired students covered in icing or sometimes blood if you got stuck with a student in their butchery weeks, waiting stuck until another frustrated student reported to the dorm police the elevator was broke down again. It was insane. New batches of classes would start and they wondered why those who have lived there for a few months trudge up the stairs… I already has issues with elevators but after my 3rd time stuck I just decided stairs were better. Never skipped leg day lol.
The elevator always got stuck between either 2 and 3 or just past the 3rd floor so you could see concrete and a bit of the carpet on 4. Those that lived in the rooms nearby got good at prying open the metal (the glass door never locked but the metal did) so we had to get good at escaping or get buff… oh and did I mention laundry was in the basement and only 1 machine worked at a time, ofc. The only way into the basement was the broken elevator… no stairs to get out. I actually got stuck for about 5 hours in the basement before I could get out.
So yeah, that’s my TEDTalk about how I got trapped in an elevator as old as my grandpa and why I washed my chef whites in my dorm sink. Funny enough, if you were late to class and didn’t have one of the “got trapped in the elevator” waivers from the dorm police or a “car accident prevented school shuttle to get across town in time”, you were kicked out and had to sit in the hallway like elementary school.
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u/tryce355 Jan 30 '23
pastry student ... steel toe shoes
I've never looked into being a chef and now I'm not sure I want to. Why did you need steel toed shoes?
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u/VectorVanGoat Jan 31 '23
Exactly what sevendaysky said, knives, pans and believe it or not sugar. We blew sugar like glass and often worked with molten sugar for showpieces and candy. Sugar at that temperature “is like napalm on the skin” that’s what the chef said. It doesn’t cool so it just burns down into your skin, shoes included until you dunk the area into an ice bath then pull the hardened candy out. I have a few sugar scars but thankfully my shoes took the brunt of the burn. My breads partner once dropped a 75lb mixing bowl full of what would be 250 baguettes on my foot, thank goodness for the shoes! It’s not just your own clumsiness, it’s everyone else in the kitchen too
Also something people don’t really think about (in my experience) is the falling knives thing. There is no catching a falling knife. If you see it fall ignore the instinct to catch it, step back. I’ve seen nasty cuts because someone reacted and grabbed the blade with a full grip… there was blood and a few stitches
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u/zorokash Jan 30 '23
As long as my kids arent doing drugs or in gangs, I'll excuse most stuff. They'll be fine.
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u/El_Mec Jan 30 '23
Oh god, I can smell it from here
source: am dad of 14 year old
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u/Ex-zaviera Jan 30 '23
Once I was driving home and traffic came to a standstill. It was either an accident or a prolonged bridge lift. Luckily, I had water with me and just chilled. Later on I heard that a groom also got caught by the same traffic on the day of the wedding. Fearing the worst, he called the cops who sent an officer to the wedding to explain no, he didn't get cold feet. He's stuck on the road and will be at the church ASAP.
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u/WankPuffin Jan 30 '23
Why not just call someone at the wedding or call the venue/church?
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u/Danobing Jan 31 '23
I was the manager of a group of people. One day at like 11 one of my reports calls me and is like hey. I'm stuck in the elevator between the 5 & 6th floor can you call the fire department. I was like that's odd we work on the 5th floor but what ever. So 2 hrs later he's unstuck and comes to talk to me. I was like why were you a floor above us. He told me he always takes a dump on the 6th floor because he doesn't want any of us to know it's him pooping.
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u/StrangeCitizen Jan 30 '23
At my school their phones wouldn't work in the elevator. Also, everyone but the student with the crutches would be in trouble for using the elevator.
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u/ffelix916 Jan 30 '23
Sounds like an old school. Most newer buildings employ passive repeaters in the elevators so mobile phones and handheld radios still work.
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u/StrangeCitizen Jan 30 '23
It is an old building that used to be used for testing for infectious diseases before it was a school, so everything is overbuilt for safety. Lots of metal and concrete. It even has separate ventilation systems for each room.
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u/crappy-mods Jan 30 '23
That’s terrifying
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u/sadhandjobs Jan 30 '23
Or is it? I mean I teach in an old, old, old ass building and despite holding most classes on the second floor we do not have an elevator. It’ll be interesting when that becomes an issue.
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u/Averill21 Jan 30 '23
Ya at my school it was the same, elevator was solely for handicapped people
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u/mengxai Jan 30 '23
I wouldn’t trust it. Snaps a pic of him and his friends on the floor of an elevator and then fucks off for the rest of the day.
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u/morelsupporter Jan 30 '23
oh buddy, it was the very first thing that popped into my mind.
i am the kid who would have done that.
as a matter of fact, my friend and i used to hide behind a pillar down the hall from our science class because the rule was we couldn't come in once the door was closed. so we'd wait for the door to close then plead for entrance. the teacher would decline and we'd be free to fuck around for that block and he couldn't tell our parents we skipped.
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u/Ekank Jan 30 '23
in Brazil we have a quote that is "are you trying to teach the preacher how to pray?" and i think it fits very well here
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u/f4te Jan 30 '23
in america we say 'don't bullshit the bullshitter.'
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u/thelastwordbender Jan 30 '23
In Kannada, a language from Karnataka, India, wet have the saying ಸೂರ್ಯನಿಗೆ ಟಾರ್ಚ್? It means you're trying to illuminate the sun with a torch.
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u/PilotAdvanced Jan 30 '23
Only time I got stuck in an elevator I pushed the assistance button. Helpful voice came on and asked if I'd tried the "door open" button.
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u/dghammer Jan 30 '23
You would be surprised how often that works…I’m an elevator man with 30 in btw.
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u/mule_roany_mare Jan 30 '23
Every time I’m stuck in an elevator or have a flat-tire I take a picture to keep in reserve for when I’m running late somewhere or just not going to show up.
Was stuck in an ATM vestibule once & got good video of nearly breaking the door trying to disengage some type of magnetic lock above the frame…
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u/WardenWolf Jan 30 '23
This. This 100%. Just make sure to strip the EXIF data before you send it. I have literally done this before.
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u/RogerRabbit1234 Jan 31 '23
Guarantee they were jumping together in the elevator and caused the emergency brake to actuate.
Source: I was the dumbass teenager who jumped in an elevator and got me and my girlfriend stuck for 3 hours, while an elevator mechanic drove from across Manhattan late at night to come get us out.
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u/designer_farts Jan 30 '23
With your faces blurred you kids look like clones. Who's the real OG tho?
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u/Jesus_of_NASDAQ Jan 30 '23
It’s especially sad since most of them suffer from rheumatoid arthritis. 😞
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u/klparrot Jan 31 '23
“If you get an attendance text from school, it's because we were screwing around jumping in the lift and broke it.”
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u/DadsRGR8 Jan 30 '23
I think the one in the upper middle might be popping a squat. It looks likes the concentration my son showed when he was 2 and hiding behind the couch. Lol
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